Hi there- I'm new here. (Thanks Vicki, for directing me to this site! )

My boyfriend has what I term severe sleep apnea, though he's never been treated.  He stops breathing several times in his sleep, twitches uncontrollably and snores so fiercely that we can't stay at my parents house anymore.

The past four weeks have been unbearable.

Unfortunately, he has declared bankruptcy and can't afford to see a doctor for the next two months.

We love sleeping together, but I just can't take it anymore.

So....here's the question-

I'm looking into buying a bigger bed for us eventually.  (Yes, I know a doctor's visit is cheaper than a new bed, but that also involves talking him into going.   )

Is there any type bed that you can recommend where one side won't feel the other side moving around?  If he eventually gets a CPAP, will the twitching stop?  And the snoring?



Last edited by phalaeo on Mon Feb 09, 2009 12:22 am; edited 2 times in total

BTW, here is a sound only video of him sleeping- if it isn't apnea, I don't know what it is.  He holds his breath and can't breathe for almost a minute at times, he gasps for air, snores, moves around and twitches.

http://s84.photobucket.com/albums/k36/phalaeo/?action=view&current=misc056.flv

We just bought a Simmons Beautyrest - it helps compared to our old bed but his twitching and jerking still wakes me up all night. Starting CPAP did not help at all with the twitching.

He needs to go to a doctor to get a sleep study - a new bed won't help with the snoring. CPAP will stop the snoring though :)

I spoke with him this afternoon, and he agreed to go for a sleep study.  The CPAPs are cheaper than a new bed anyways.

Expect to find me poking around and asking questions as time goes on!

Thanks,
phal

A new bed may help you feel better because the newer beds are awesome. We bought a Sleep Number bed, and it's wonderful. But --- only recently has the twitching and jerking started. The bed actually has settings for different hardness softness, but when my husband starts twitching and jerking, the whole bed moves around.
We have a queen sized bed and it's wonderfully cozy. We usually get King sized beds when we travel, and we are far apart.  I do sleep better, but if he snores he is pretty loud.
I do NOT recommend a larger bed for the sleep apnea issues. It doesn't seem like it would help. Even if you didn't feel the twitching, you would still hear the snoring, gasping, and snorting.  
You might want to get a second bed to move to after he falls asleep. That is what I am going to do when we have the extra money.
Nancy

Phalaeo,

Hey there   .

Until people get treated, we recommend they sleep as inclined as possible.  It is a gravity thing, the more horizontal you are, the more gravity collapses the throat tissue.  Therefore, many people sleep in a recliner.

As far as generally avioding the other person's movements, has anyone tried a Tempurpedic?  You know, the one where they jump up and down on the bed and don't spill over a glass of wine.  I was on a bed where they had bought just a layer of that kind of material to go over the regular mattress.  It is a lot cheaper than buying a whole Tempurpedic.  My friend said he bought the top at one of those bulk discount stores for around $130 and it wasn't a Termpurpedic, but it was heavenly.  I got the same thing for my daughter's bed at one of those bed and bath stores.

NancyL/mtnplayva
If your spouses are being 100% compliant with their CPAP and their CPAP is correcting their apneas, then they are probably twitching because they have PLMD and that disorders needs to be addressed because it also disrupts sleep.  Here is my cut and paste on PLMD:

There are two main kinds of limb movement during sleep.  During an apneic event, there is limb movement due to futile attempts to breath.  As apnea is compensated with the use of CPAP, the effort to breath is eliminated and the limb movement decreases.

Periodic Limb Movement Disorder (PLMD) is the sleeping cousin to the awake Restless Legs Syndrome (RLS) and these are both neurological disorders.  There is a circadian cycle to RLS/PLMD which is why the symptoms of RLS are worse at night.  Not all people with RLS have PLMD and visa versa.  You can have one and not the other.  I happen to have both.  With RLS/PLMD, the calmer the body is, the worse the symptoms are.  Since these are neurological disorders they must be treated with medication.  The common first line drugs of choice are low dose anti-Parkinson’s drugs such as Requip or Mirapex.  Second line drugs are benzodiazepines such as Klonopin, but these drugs are addictive.  Additionally, anemia exacerbates PLMD/RLS so that needs to be ruled out.  I don’t know if this is applicable to others, but drinking alcohol also exacerbates my RLS/PLMD.
 
PLMD is itself very disruptive to sleep.  In my case, I was first treated for OSA and a few years later, when I started becoming fatigued again, a sleep study showed PLMD.  I had known quite awhile I had RLS since that is a awake/conscious disorder.

A sleep study with CPAP rules out whether the limb movement is due to the effort to breath or PLMD.  Not only does CPAP eliminate the movement if it is effort related, but this movement is always linked to an apneic event whereas PLMD is random movement.

You can find more information here:

Restlessless Legs Syndrome Foundation

Vicki


_________________
Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.
Marilyn Von Savant

That which does not kill you makes you stronger-Friedrich Nietzsche
Friedrich must of had apnea.

Hi Vicki~

Thanks again for all of your help.

I thought benzodiazepines were not good for apnea patients though?

I have a suggestion for a bed, an adjustable bed, get two extra long  twin bed and put them side by side in extra large king size sleigh bed frame. When they are both flat it looks like a California King, but each side is adjustable. The ones we have have separate wirelesss remotes, and I can not lay flat because of my back so I sleep in a fowlers position, (kind of sitting up or reclining with the foot of the bed slightly elevated) my wife used to sleep in it with it being flat, The beds also have head and foot vibrations with a variety of different  motions and intensities. I personally don't use that as it triggers pain and muscle spasms in me. Anyway I like the beds because, if I wake up in the night and need to change position a little I just grab the remote controller and raise or lower the head or foot or both just a bit. And for sleep apnea its great! I got  mine at the store that is named after a major city in Colorado,  and it is a Mattress store and they have a great selection of adjustable bed with all types of mattress's Might be something to consider?


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I'll second the vote for the sleep number bed for comfort, not treating a disorder. wE bough tours 5yrs ago and have had no problems with it. The reason we like it is the fact that it changes with you . Your not stuck with the bed that felt good one particular night. We own 2 and have recommended them to everybody we know. If beds are an addiction we are hooked.