Well last night was the worst night I have ever had.  I couldn't sleep and I tried everything from reading, watching tv, thinking if everything imaginable.  It was so bad that I felt like anxiety in my chest and like my heart was pounding about to jump out of my chest.  I was still awake at 2am so she said there was no point carrying on so I came home.  I was crying all the way home and I feel so terrible like there is no hope.  I want to find out what is wrong and I had so high hopes but I never expected not to be able to fall asleep.  Maybe it was because I didn't take my sleeping tablet.  I don't know.  But normally I fall asleep within 10-15 mins.  I ended up asking her if my heart rate was high and she said no that my ekg monitoring was fine so what the anxiety was I don't know.  How will they ever find out what is wrong with me if I can't do the sleep study.  I am so upset.  I'm going to call the dcotor and see what they say.  I need to get this sleep study done and I am wondering how I am ever going to be able to fall alseep.  I don't think my sleeping tablet will be enough.  

Wendy

Hi Wendy, sorry for all the frustration and unease.  I do understand.  Sounds like you were very anxious.  I just had my second sleep study since July.  It was Thursday night, going home on Friday morning.  I was concerned as you.  I do recall this time that I remember waking up or opening my eyes and seeing the ceiling, etc above me and wondering about my sleep.  My therapist said that i did sleep though.  She told me that they have to have 7 hours of sleep study of which i needed to be asleep for 4 hours.  It was weird i would open my eyes, move around and adjust in bed and then aparently without really knowing it, go back to sleep.  

You will make it through.  If you are a spiritual person, why not try praying and asking God to bless you and the sleep study, the therapist who is helping you, etc.  Some would say it is silly, but I believe that God is in even the tiniest of details of our lives all the way through the toughest.  I wish you the best.  

I do understand your frustration.  You sound as if you are exhausted.  Once you have your study done, find out if you need to go on a machine and if necessary begin using one, you will feel better.  My guess about your lack os sleep at the study is you are keyed up, stressed, exhausted, and your mind would not allow you to relax and rest....plus let's face it, we all look like the bride of frankenstein with all the wires!  hahaha  Come on, laugh.  

Anyway, i wish you the best.  I feel certain that you will work it out.  I would definately speak to your doctor's office about what happened, maybe the sleep center again.  Hang in there!!

Hoosierkitkat        ps:  i am not a doctor, nurse, respitory therapist, or anything, just a person with obstructive sleep apnea who is trying to learn as much as i can as time goes on.  I have only been on cpap machine myself for about 8 weeks.

Hi Wendy,

I am so sorry for you and I can say I have been in your shoes.  The first sleep study I ever tried to have I had a full blown anxiety attack and left at the same time as you.  Please do not do what I did however and wait 5 years before you try again.  Now, I've have 5 or 6 six successful studies.

This may sound backwards from everything I told you, as I am sure that you had all of your questions answered before you went to the lab, took stuff to make you comfortable, etc.  But I'm pretty sure you just tried too hard.  The performance anxiety trap, you probably laid there and stuff like this went through your head, "this has to work, it has got to work or else I'll never get better and I'll be doomed to a terrible life forever, come on!!! why can't I go to sleep??!!!!"  See what I mean.

First, schedule another study.  Second make sure you do have all of your questions answered.  Finally, give yourself a break and be kind and gentle to your already beaten up self.  Try to come to the understanding that it is OK if you don't sleep.  It doesn't mean you're doomed to anything or your a bad person or wasteful of anyone's time or money.  It very simply means, *sigh* oh well, I'll just try again.  I think that by taking the pressure off yourself to sleep, you might just do it.

Vicki


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That which does not kill you makes you stronger-Friedrich Nietzsche
Friedrich must of had apnea.