My hubby just got his diagnosis of sleep apnea.  He is absolutely terrified of having to sleep with a mask (and does suffer from moderate claustrophobia). I also see in reading through these posts that people have a lot of trouble with the masks.  He had a stroke 10 years ago (at age 39) -- and, yes, it does seem a possibility that apnea could have caused his stroke. The reason he got the sleep study was because the doctors think he may have been experiencing TIAs (transient mini-strokes) in recent weeks.  For me, I'm glad for the diagnosis, because he may mean he will be safer from any more strokes, along with less tired and perhaps even a happier guy. Complicating the mask problem is that he is partially paralyzed on his left side, and that makes moving around in bed, and getting comfortable extremely difficult.  He still has to have his first appointment with a sleep doctor, which we will be setting up immediately.  Please tell me how I can support him, calm him down and encourage him that finding out about this can be a GOOD thing!

Hello My name is Jennifer, and my husband has very severe sleep apnea. It is a wonderful thing that he has been diagnosed, because I thought that he had sleep apnea for awhile, and then when he was diagnosed it was an answer. It meant that we knew what was going on. We knew that he was not lazy, and that most important of all that it was not his fault. Although my husband does not experience the problems you husband may have with the mask. He experienced no problems with his mask. He loves it. Although it does not make a sore on the bottom of his nose. If he has problems sleeping with it they have a special pillow that will make it easier to sleep with called the pappilow. Although it only works if he sleeps on his side, which is the position that is reccomended when a person has sleep apnea. It does take a little bit to get used to, but it is worth it. Since my husband has had his mask he has slept without it one time and said he will never do it again. When he puts the mask on he sleeps soundly and does not toss and turn. All I can say is encourage him tell him the positives of the mask. It will give him his life back it is amazing what lack of sleep does to someone and their family. Explain to him that sleeping without the mask is pointless is because he is not recieving quality sleep. Hopefully he can choose the type of mask, and can pick the type out that he is most comfortable with. I wish you all the luck.

Hi Suze,

Wow.  Judging by your husband's health with stroke problems, cpap treatment will be very important for him.
So it's just as important that it be as comfortable as possible.
Most of the time that comfort depends on the mask.

Make sure he gets a chance to try different ones.  A lot of it depends on whether or not he is a mouth breather.
But there are nasal pillows or similar masks which are much less claustrophobic, and the hose is placed in such a way that might benefit your husband's sleeping position.  

Does your husband like to use the internet?  He might benefit from using a discussion board or chatroom, if he likes to do it.  Not everyone cares for computers, but if he likes them, he might consider using one.  In that way he won't feel all alone with this.  You are very supportive, a terrific wife.  But sometimes it helps to talk with others who have the condition, no matter how understanding the spouse is.  Also, it might help to know that sleeping with this thing is so much easier than the experience of using it in a sleep study clinic.  Also, be sure he gets a heated humidifier with it.  For insurance to cover it, the doctor may have to include that in the prescription.  I found that I really need it, and it sure helps to make sleeping with the mask easier.

Keep in touch and let him know he's not alone in this.  If he or you have any questions, just let us know.  I have a strong hunch those mini-strokes will disappear, and likely right away.  But we have to make sure it's comfortable enough for him to use.  So if there are any problems, let us know.


Linda

Hello Suze,

I'm so glad your husband has been diagnosed.  When I found out I had this disorder, I felt much better.  Ok, still exhausted but at least I had a reason why I was feeling so horrid.  Let him know that CPAP will become his second bestfriend, after you of course.  I would like to tell you my story so maybe it will help your husband.  I had symptoms for years...snoring and Acid Reflux, however I didn't get the "fog" and absolute exhaustion until this last January.  When that hit me I didn't know what to do.  It took a lot of conjoling from my boyfriend before I went to my doctor in April and said here's what's going on...I'm absolutely exhausted no matter how much sleep I get and now when I sleep less than 8 hours I find myself fighting to stay awake while driving.  My doctor immediately ordered a sleep study and my saga to better health began.  I was given the diagnosis of Severe Sleep Apnea in June but didn't want to go the route of CPAP at that time.  You see my sister and cousin both have Sleep Apnea and they had so many problems with CPAP therapy.  Well the TAP dental device didn't help, though I gave it my best shot.  In mid-September I had enough...tired of being sick and tired so I got hooked up with a CPAP.  Now, 3 months later, I can say I am 200% better.  After suffering acid reflux for over 3 years, it's gone.  It disappeared 1-2 monthes into my treatment.  I had noticed it had been getting progressively worse over the years but didn't link it to my snoring as being signs of Sleep Apnea.  Best of all, I'm "normal" again.  By that I mean I did have a slight depression I never realised and that's gone AND I'm no longer even a little itty bit tired.  After dealing with the debilitating exhaustion and mental fog, it's amazing that I no longer have it.  I can't tell you how happy I was to find one day that after working for 8 hours I had the energy to go shopping and walking at not one but two big stores.  The simple act of going to those stores after working a full day gave me such a feeling of happiness.  It's hard to describe to someone who hasn't ever had that level of exhaustion to say look what I was able to do.  

Now to get to this point has taken much trial and error.  I have tried 5-6 masks before I found the perfect one for me.  My pressure was at 14, but when I was still tired after 6 weeks I had it increased to a wind-blowing 16.  As to sleeping position...he should sleep in the position he finds most comfortable.  I know people say to not sleep on your back, however, I have found that besides sleeping on my tummy, that's my other favorite position after using CPAP.  When I had my titration done, they had me sleep on my back so I figure it will be ok since they found the pressure needed to keep my airway open.  I wouldn't recommend this position though until he has his CPAP as it does cause more apneas.  Now you said he was claustraphobic so I would suggest he look at nasal pillows.  I have an Activa nasal mask, however, it makes me feel a tad claustraphobic.  Now I have the Headrest (formerly Aura) nasal pillows by AEIOmed and this mask is absolutely awesome.  This is the first mask I found that works well for sleeping on your stomache.  Also, it doesn't feel like you are wearing a mask because it's so light and you don't have straps on your face.  Ok, it may look a little silly but who cares.  The swift (nasal pillows) is also a light interface, however, I couldn't sleep on my stomache with them.  Many people do like the swift interface.

Also, if he does use the Internet I would encourage him to check out this message board and that of cpaptalk.  I have found that it helps to read what other people like me are going through.  It gives me a level of comfort to know I'm not alone and help is just one message away.  If your husband doesn't use the Internet, here's a good time for him to learn.  I found that getting involved in my treatment helped me to become more compliant quicker.  If I didn't have these message boards I would have still been fighting with my mask problems and be very tired.

Good luck to you and your husband.  Please keep us updated on how well he's doing.

Melinda

Jennifer wrote:

If he has problems sleeping with it they have a special pillow that will make it easier to sleep with called the pappilow.

Hi Jennifer,
My husband is often complaining about his pillow and how it interferes with his cpap mask and hose. I googled and found nothing, please tell me more!

Ooops sorry, forgot to sign in, my question about the pappilow is above.

If you go to http://www.talkaboutsleep.biz/cpap-pillow-papillow/index.htm you can order one. The cost is $39 to $59. I found out about this pillow from one of the moderator's on this site. The ladies who invented this both have sleep apnea and invented the pillow. I hope this information helps you out. It is worth a try.