Ok, folks, help me out. He wanted the full mask and not the nose pillows because he says he breathes through his mouth. He's had the cpap for 3 nights, and all 3 nights, about 2 am he takes off his mask because he can not sleep at all.  
Of course, this is annoying. He snores more and makes more noise after he takes the mask off.

But I'm concerned. We rushed into this so that he would be rested for his new job. Job starts Monday and he won't have time to deal with doctors and stuff....
What can he do to help himself sleep? Or am I supposed to stay out of htis and let my beloved husband figure it out on his own?
In the meantime, if this doesn't come to some resolution soon, I'm going to buy a bed and create a guest room.  I need some sleep.  Yeesh.   My bedroom is so noisy adn most earplugs just fall out.  Nancy

it can take 2-4 weeks of consistently wearing the mask every night to get used to it so that you don't take it off when you're half awake. is he getting to sleep at all with it on?  if not he could ask his dr for some sedatives for a few nights... and there is always the wear-it-while-awake daily exercise that we talk about on here.  if he is getting to sleep then taking it off while half awake, then that is a time thing... and you might be able to help by gently waking him enough to put the mask back on, and he might get a bit more sleep.  you want to stay out of it to some extent, but stay positive and encouraging so he doesn't give up.  

i think he should be able to find answers through here without necessarily having to take time off work to see doctors.  anyway his new employer should just have to deal with it - stuff happens and people can't magically have no medical issues in the first few weeks.  that is life.  its all how your husband handles it with the boss too.  if i was a boss and a new employee was going through this, i'd rather they took some time off than made mistakes and risked injury at work.  but not every boss is so sensible of course!

try to find some customisable/moldable earplugs that will stay in.  maybe tape across them with gentle first aid tape.  i do think a resolution is not far way, but if you need to set up camp at the other end of the house then do what you have to do.  you could even rent or borrow a single bed for a few weeks.


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45

He says he just lays there awake. A friend told him that perhaps the big black box is the older style that is too loud, so he wants to see if there is a smaller and quieter one available.  other than that, I don't know. Thanks for the speedy reply, Kiwi.   Nancy

the machine is usually not so loud that it stops the person with apnea from sleeping.  the spouse yes, sometimes.  what type of machine and mask does he have?

he is going to need to work on getting used to CPAP.  is he very motivated do you think, or is it more that you've encouraged him to do it and he's not really convinced how serious it is. alot of times men have trouble admitting the problem... they are conditioned to not show any sign of weakness and their mind plays tricks on them so they are in denial.  of course, having sleep apnea is not a sign of weakness at all.  and your husband desperately needs treatment for the sake of his health and you. once he is treated you won't have to worry so much about him, you will sleep better, and you can probably sleep together again. i hope he understands this and works on adapting to CPAP. when he does, there are specific things he can do like wearing it while awake sitting in the living area.


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45

Yes, he is motivated and it has nothing to do with my encouragement. The boy needs to get healthy again and is sick of being sick. Getting adequate rest will surely help him with all his other ills.
He puts the mask on and then lays there for a few hours, not even fully half asleep. Says he flat out doesn't sleep.  I don't know because I only hear him when he takes the mask off and starts snoring.
It is really loud and makes a whirring noise as well as inhalation/exhalation noise.

ok.  do you think he would come here and work through the issues he's having? if not, it's ok, i'll just recommend things anyway.  (everyone else please help too!)

would still be good to know what kind of machine and mask - there could be a mechanical fault even.  my machine is almost completely silent and the breathing noise is at the mask and is pretty unnoticeable.  maybe he should consider earplugs... just thinking outside the box here.

what is your DME supplier like?  if they are helpful, they should be actively working through the issues, lending him different bits and pieces to try etc.  most DMEs aren't that good.  your insurer might allow a choice between DMEs. call around and pick one that gives good service and support.

what is his sleep doctor like?  would he do a phone consult or allow email contact to discuss the issues?  is there anything in the sleep study report or anything particular about his sleep apnea disorder to shed light on things?  (if hubby is ok about this) what medications is he on?  (if you'd rather keep the info private that is fine - i'll just say many meds can act to keep you awake, and that should be addressed).  if there is no reason against it, short term sedatives or sleep aids to get him to sleep and getting used to wearing a mask may help.  

are asthma or allergies making him a bit scared to go to sleep with the mask on?  does he know that he won't suffocate if the power goes off?

is he napping during the day?  napping is the enemy of good sleep.  is he must nap, he needs to wear his mask.  "always NAP with your PAP" is what people here say.

does he know about good 'sleep hygiene' such as avoiding coffee at night, avoiding large meals before bedtime etc.  never hurts to go over that stuff again to be sure.  a hot bath, music, reading for a few minutes before lights out, these things can all help.


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45

Great questions.
Yes he would come here if he decided to and more readily if he thought of it on his own.
His machine is a big black box with a humidifier, and his mask is a full mask with gel.  His sleep doctor would take a call, yes. His supplier has only said that he has 30 days to try out different masks.
He has to get off his high horse and make the dang phone calls, even if it is inconvenient and interferes with his work. He has to make a point of doing this himself. I'm NOT doing it for him.
The supplier was kind of flaky, but offerred all kinds of help while we were there.  I hope they are open on Saturdays and he just calls tomorrow. The doctors at the clinic say they are avialable on email, but I don't think we have their addresses.

Most of the meds he is on have the tendency to keep him drowsy. He just isn't adjusting to change well at all. And now he's cranky again. He went through a deal with sedatives a year ago after a surgery and they just don't work for him. Long story, but they don't work.

So...I guess he needs to come on the forum here and learn on his own...AND CALL HIS vendor. I think the machine sounds louder and different than when he was at the sleep clinic, but far be it for me to suggest anything like reading the instructions or calling them. He needs to make the time to take care of this. I'm done being the babysitter. I hadn't thought about the suffocating thing.

One question: are the nostril pillows easier to adjust to? He insisted on the mask that covers nose and mouth (and most of his face) and it just looks annoyingly uncomfortable.

Thanks again....I'm cranky and I'm tired too.  I get no rest and no relaxation around here right now.
Nancy

oh i know your pain, Nancy.  i know cranky, for sure.  many of us here do.  they say sometimes the best thing for a mother with a colicky baby, is for a friend to take the baby away for one day so the mother can sleep!  maybe you need a night away from your big baby  

i suspected that i could give you all the info in the world but if he isn't going to get off his posterior then you and i are wasting our time.  i admire you for recognising that you shouldn't rescue him.  doing that doesn't help them at all.  it is very hard not to step in though.

well, you have planted some seeds in his mind.  maybe we sit back and see what happens next.  keep looking after you, Nancy.  it's an ironic analogy, but when the plane is going down you gotta put on your own oxygen mask first.  

his machine will have the manufacturer's name and model type on it somewhere (i suspect it might be a Respironics, not sure).  he probably likes the full face mask because he doesn't want to try to unblock a stuffy nose.  right now, i don't even think it's worth the effort of lifting the machine to find out its name.  we shall call it Harold perhaps!

hang in there Nancy.


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45

I love it. Harold.  Ok you got me curious --- it is a Respironics RemStarPro M series.  A friend's husband evidently has severe sleep apnea and had this machine. She made him go and find a quieter machine, so he found something that was way quieter and allowed her to sleep.  I like Harold -- you made me laugh. Harold sounds like a kitchen mixer, revving and then slowing over and over again. Nancy

Good, I knew you needed a laugh, Nancy!  I don't think Harold is healthy.  He should not be making that noise.  However, someone qualified to diagnose Harold needs to drop by and tell us what his species normally sounds like.  I will start a post seeking out such a person


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45

The M series has had this problem.  I called Respironics about mine and they told me a new one could not be guaranteed to not make the same sound so I got a different brand all together.  Call Respironics and talk to them about it.

Vicki


_________________
Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.
Marilyn Vos Savant

That which does not kill you makes you stronger-Friedrich Nietzsche
Friedrich must of had apnea.

Vicky,
What did you switch too? We'll call the supplier on Monday. WE have 30 days to mess with the supplier before we are stuck with it. They offerred different masks, but said NOTHING about the machine itself.
Nancy

test

Hey folks, I'm Nancy's hubby.

I'm VERY motivated to make this cpap thing work! It's just taking some time is all. Last night was the best yet with some 6 hours of sleep with the cpap. I woke up at 4:30am and took the mask off. I wasn't very awake so I'm not sure why I took it off. But it was the longest un-interrupted stretch yet. And I went right to sleep too instead of laying there listening to the noisy machine aka vacuum cleaner!

Monday I will call our supplier and ask about getting a ResMed S8 Elite II I'm told it's a lot quieter and smaller too.

Welcome along RamblinLamb!  it's so good to see you.  and i'm delighted to hear that you got to sleep with the CPAP at last.  it's not easy to get used to is it.  I think once you get a quieter machine things should be better.  i wonder if sometimes these DMEs never even check the machines to make sure they are working ok, because they assume a certain amount of people are just going to give up anyway.  well, we have news for them don't we.  

i have only been using my machine for about 7 weeks - it's a Resmed Autoset Spirit II - looks like a little spaceship   i did still take my mask off in the middle of the night for a couple of weeks - it sounds like alot of people here do.  it's like, even though we know we really want to wear it all night, once we are half asleep the subconscious mind says "whoa, that's not natural!" and we take it off.  i hope things keep getting better for you from here on in!


_________________
"Attitude is a little word that makes a big difference" - Winston S Churchill
Machine: Respironics M Series Pro, 17cm
Mask 1: Respironics Comfortgel nasal
Mask 2: Resmed Quattro full face
37yo female, New Zealand, Mixed SA, AHI 45