My spouse has been diagnosed with sleep apnea over a year ago and at first used his cpap machine. Somehow he quit using it and now almost a year later his weight has sky rocketed and he sleeps all the time on weekends.  I have been his cheer leader for so long and I am trying to support him ising the cpap machine but i feel neglected. I think he uses it as an excuse to say mean things to me.  I dont know how much longer I can do this. We have been married 27 years.  I use earplugs every night and they dont always work.

What is he using as an excuse to say mean things to you?  His sleep apnea?  Or his cpap?

You said he started cpap a year ago and quit,  how long did he actually use his cpap?  And did he tell you why he quit, have you discussed it?  
If he's stopped using cpap close to a year ago, then  his symptoms may be worsening.  And while experiencing these symptoms, people with untreated sleep apnea don't think straight and aren't always nice.  It's affecting his health, and his mind.   But untreated, it is a SERIOUS health risk.  I hope he's aware of this.  Does he know what the health risks are?  Why did he quit?  Was he having trouble with the mask or breathing with the machine?  Has he discussed this with his doctor?  Is there someone such as a doctor, other family member, friend or whomever who could talk to him?

Sorry for all the questions.  But it's important to know why he quit.  It could be just frustration and giving up.  But if there were specific problems with dealing with the mask or machine, there are other things he can do to make using the mask and machine much easier.  

I'm not a spouse, but I know his situation is affecting you.  Is he aware of how it affects you?  Talk to him, maybe threaten to sleep elsewhere until he's re-started his cpap.  Tell him you won't have him talking mean to you.  I'm not one to give advice, and every situation is different.  I just hope every effort is used to get him back to using cpap.  Only then can he feel better, treat you better and not neglect you.  Untreated sleep apnea really takes a toll on the person and often they are so bad off they don't even realize what's happening, or they get so depressed that they don't act normally.  I do hope he can get back to using cpap.


Linda


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Yes if leat sleep apnea untreated,  it can  it can be life-threatening and have significant consequences such as driving danger, high blood pressure, other cardiovascular disease, erectile dysfunction (impotence), poor memory, short temper, headaches sore throat or dry mouth in the morning.

Honestly to say, 80% of couples end up sleeping in different rooms because of noise disruption. I know you are very supportive and care a lot to your spouse.  That's why you are getting advices from here to see it can help out.

To deal with sleep apnea between spouse, it is a kind of thing that need 2 of you to work together hand in hand.  Find one day suitable to talk and let your spouse more how your inside feel and how supportive you are all along with him/her.


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Informations on Sleep Apnea & Snoring & Insomnia